What Flow Do You Follow?

Picture this:  you’re on a cruise visiting one of the most majestic islands in the world:  Bermuda.  You laid the best plans to visit a quiet, secluded beach on the opposite end of the island to spend the day frolicking in the gentle surf with your family.  Disembarking your ship, you head straight to the ferry terminal to catch the first one only to find no one in line. 

“What?  There are 6,000 people docked at this port and we are the only ones???”  A nice gentleman with the Bermuda Tourism agency told us the ferry dock was closed because the maintenance technicians across the island were on strike.  No ferries for now…

We returned from our cruise to Bermuda this past Sunday.  We had planned different excursions for each of the 3 days docked there.  Thursday was planned to timeliness perfection:  Spend the day at Tobacco Bay Beach, our favorite.  We’d catch the 9:30 a.m. ferry to St. George’s and then walk to the beach.  Catch the 3:30 p.m. ferry back to our ship where we had been invited to dine with the Captain that evening.  Plenty of time to have fun and get ready for dinner.  With the ferry strike going on, we decided we’d take the bus only to find out where the other 6,000 passengers were!  Plan A – strike!  Plan B – Strike!  We didn’t have a Plan C.  Until we ran into our friends who wanted to go to Elbow Bay Beach, one of the pink sand beaches of the south shore.

OK, we’ll go with you!  But, how do we get there?  By this time the line waiting for the buses was greatly expanding.

Our friends said, “Hey, let’s catch a cab…”   I thought it was a good idea until I saw the price:  $60 one way!  Yikes!  Well, since we’re splitting it with our friends, it wasn’t so bad.  It could have been much worse, though.  We could have become increasingly upset as each unplanned incident led to another.  But, we had decided at the beginning of our vacation to simply take things, “as they come and go with the flow.”  Ya’ know what?  We had a SPECTACULAR time!

When things disrupt your carefully laid plans, how do you handle it?  Do you fume and blame?  Or, follow the flow.  Have you ever had a speech interrupted?  Loud noises, microphone cut-out, unexpected audience participation?  To be truly “in the moment” of your speech, you must plan for these things.  If you ignore the interruption or get flustered, you’ll lose your audience.  Stay with it, acknowledge it, and keep going.  You might even uncover some humor along the way!

I once had an audience member shout out, “Yes!!!” during a particular triumphant moment in my speech.  I didn’t let me get off track.  Instead, I simply said, “Thank you!” and moved on.  The audience stayed with me and actually chuckled.

Plan for interruptions, plan for derailments, plan for the unexpected.  And, when it happens, follow the flow… just go with it!

And the Sorbet

Do you remember the last time you went to a French restaurant?  Even if you have never been to one, I’m sure you have at least heard of the art of fine dining and French cuisine.  In the little town where I went to college, a small, quaint, and historic restaurant stood on Main Street, called Au Petit Paris.  Every year on parents’ weekend, Mom and Dad took me there for dinner.  What a treat!  My first taste of escargot, lobster bisque, and frog legs smoothly passed my pallet like a blanket of decadent, delightful deliciousness.  I’ll admit you have to be somewhat adventurous to eat at a place like that.  But, I’ll never forget how special that restaurant made me feel.  With five courses to relish, we knew we’d have to carve out some major time to take it all in.  The French never eat fast! 

One thing that surprised me…. Sorbet in between the first and second course!  I thought, “Why would we have dessert after the first course?” 

Then my father explained, “Sorbet cleanses the pallet.  It helps us digest what we just ate.  And, it is supposed to help us get ready for the next course.”

That makes total sense!  And, it was tasty, too.

Years later, I often think of those wonderful evenings with my parents.  Unfortunately, the restaurant is closed now.  But, the flavor of the food still remains; just like the words of a good book; or a blockbuster movie; or a motivational seminar.  How can we help our words remain in the hearts of our audience?

It’s all about the sorbet!  When you finish a story or a point in your message, do you allow your audience to digest what you just said before you move onto the next point?  If you don’t, you’re allowing an incredibly valuable tool to slip away:  the PAUSE.  I call it a “sorbet moment.”

When you finish one point in your message, allow your audience to take a bite of sorbet.  This will give them a chance to digest what you just said so they are ready to move onto the next point with you.  Otherwise, one of two things will happen:  either they will be too busy trying to imprint what you just said.  Or, they’ll simply forget it all together in an effort to stay with you as you move forward.  Either way, you’ll lose them.

Think about this:  have you ever had a restaurant server bring you the next course before you were finished with the first one?  How did that make you feel?  Rushed?  Hustled?  Unimportant?  If you deliver your second point without giving your audience time to digest the first one, they’ll feel the same way.  Pause often;  Pause longer; Pause for sorbet.

Keep Powering Up!

Liza

Three Days

Darren LaCroix

What happens three days AFTER you hear a presentation?  Did anything stick that inspired you to make a change?  What about your own audience?  Do you hear from anyone three days AFTER you speak?

This past weekend, I had the fortune of attending a key note presentation given by a man who has profoundly changed the way I even THINK about speaking… let alone speaking itself:  Darren LaCroix, the 2001 World Champion of Public Speaking.  My greatest takeaway from his speech was Three Days.  The most important part of your speech is not the opening; not the closing; not even the body!  But, the message that the audience takes away… and what they do with it THREE days later.

Well, here we are… the third day after Darren's speech.  What do I find in my inbox this morning?  An article he wrote… and not just any article.  One that centers around the opening of MY speech at the District International Speech Contest!  That got me thinking…  my contest run is done for this year… what do I focus on now???  Darren’s voice popped into my head..

“Liza, how many times have I told you???  Stage Time!  Stage Time!  Stage Time!!”

Gasp!  That's it!!!  I told my husband I'm going "back to school."  Back to the basics.  Of all the at-home study programs and books I purchased about public speaking, I haven't FINISHED one!  Not one!  My husband's response?   "Why?"

I said, "Because I want to get better."

He quipped, "You already are better."

I replied, "But, I want to get MORE better."  {Please don't kill me for butchering the grammar on that one}

I had such a deep connection with the audience last weekend, I almost didn't care about the results... almost (hey 2nd is not bad!).    I absolutely adored the experience I had on stage.  But, why wait a whole YEAR???  Yes, I have my Toastmasters Club.. and, sure I can join more clubs if I want.  But, I think a different direction might be in order....

Finishing those books and at-home study projects is great... but it CAN'T stop there...

Darren told us a story about Patricia Fripp, CSP, CPAE (in my opinion one of the BEST female public speakers on the planet!) and  how she got started by speaking at her local Rotary Club... now, she is fulfilling her dream helping others become better.

So, guess what?  I've already reached out to my local Rotary Club leaders to try and do the same!  And, that's just the start... my home town supports other groups, too:  Lions, Eagles, Chamber of Commerce, and, VFW (ok, I might not be able to relate to THAT one right away... but it's worth a shot!!!).

Now that I have a path forward, I can see where my growth can lead me.  What is yours?  What did you hear three days ago that has changed YOUR perspective?  Have you started something that you never FINISHED?  Go FINISH IT!!!

And, the next presentation you prepare, remember that what is most important about your speech is NOT what you do on stage... it's what your audience does THREE DAYS LATER...

Have a great day!  and Keep Powering Up!

Really? I Should Take Time OFF????

As I sat with last year's District 18 Contest winner, Marin, after my own contest win, she recommended that I do some things differently than she did.  First, she said with vehemence, "Take this week off..... at LEAST!  If you can manage two weeks, take two..."  What??? Take time off?  But, I have to begin to prepare for the Convention!  I have to make adjustments to my semi-final speech!  I have to begin working on my World Championship speech! (If I am so blessed to have the opportunity to give it)  I can't take time OFF.... I have too much to do...

Her response?  "You don't HAVE to do anything..... right now."  She said her one regret was that she jumped from the District speech contest immediately into Semifinal prep mode.... and by the time she got to the Convention she was so exhausted, she didn't have much of a chance to really enjoy it.  Wow!  That spoke volumes to me!  I have attended two Conventions now... and LOVED them both!  I can't imagine attending this year's Convention and not enjoying it... maybe she had a point.

So, here I am, doing everything possible to take time off from my speech(es).  Do you know how difficult that is???  I've spent months practicing, fine-tuning, adjusting.... to suddenly stop doing that.... it's like ripping off my own arm... (ok, well my jaw...).  But, as time goes on, and the glow of victory begins to fade... it has become a little easier.  And, I'm beginning to see the benefit of a break.

If you are familiar with my "Time Out" speech (it's on YouTube.... and it's really, really bad - you've been warned), then you know how much I value the importance of taking a little time off.... from life.

How many times do you END your work-week with the feeling that you accomplished nothing?

How many times do you BEGIN the work-week already exhausted having not rested during the weekend at all?

How many times have you... spun your wheels only to go nowhere?

Uh-uh... that's what I thought... week after week after week, right?

A few years ago, my husband and kids asked me what I wanted for Christmas... Guess what I asked for...  Jewelry?  No.  Some DVDs?  Nope...  A trip to Mars?  Well..... you're close...

I asked for TIME OFF!!!  I wanted just ONE weekend without playing chauffeur... one weekend without laundry... one weekend where I didn't have to cut up anyone's meat!

Guess what???  I got it!!!  A few months later hubbie took Darling Son camping for the weekend and my parents took Darling Daughter to their place... AHHHHHHH!  Relaxation AT LAST!!!

Guess what I did with my time?  Absolutely NOTHING!!!  At the end of the weekend, I was rested... I was rejuvenated... I was.... missing my family terribly :)

 See?  Absence really DOES make the heart grow fonder!

My takeaway for you? I only want you to "Take" one thing:   Time Off!  Take 30 minutes and enjoy a cup of coffee for once.  Take an evening and spend it with your friends talking about nothing.... Take a Saturday at the park... without your iPhone! (Gasp!  Perish the thought!!!) Take.... Time.... Off!!!!!

I might even take two...

Who is it REALLY About?

Still high from my District International Speech Contest win, I think it's time to look back. What have I learned in the last 3 years so far? I've learned to fail... and get back up; I've learned to fall.... and get back up; I've learned what winning feels like... and get back up (nearly collapsed on the floor when they called my name for first place!). What's the theme here? GET BACK UP! Last year I didn't make it past Area (that's the 2nd level of competition if you're un-familiar with how Toastmasters does it). I was devastated! I didn't realize it at the time, but my husband said I moped around the house for weeks! That is until..... I was asked to be the Contest Master for the District International Speech Contest. What an honor! I couldn't believe it! I decided to try and make the experience as close to the International level as possible for the speakers (considering I had been in the audience for several of them). I set up the stage like they do at International; I created the Certificates like they do at International; I even made sure they had a "green" room to rest and prep. I KNEW this was going to be FUN!

Soon after the word got out around the District that I would be the Contest Master, I received dozens of emails, text messages, FB posts, and voicemails. All saying, "Hey, Liza! This is a GREAT opportunity for you to showcase your skills!" My reply? No way! This is NOT about me, this is about Them! This is THEIR show! I want to spend as little time on stage as possible. And, ya' know what? It went off without a hitch! The contest was awesome and I had an absolute BALL!!

Fast forward to the plane ride out to Vegas for the 2011 Convention. I began thinking about my next contest speech. "Hmmm, what am I going to talk about? What do I want my audience to hear? What message do I want to give?" Did you notice how many times I said, "I?" WAY too many! A little voice in the back of my head reared up and roared up:

"Hey IDIOT!!!! It's NOT about YOU! It's about THEM!!!"

What do you mean?

"It's not about YOU! It's about THEM!!! Your AUDIENCE!!!" {Lightbulb!!!}

Do you know how long people have been trying to tell me that? TOO LONG!! Yes, it is my story. Yes it is my speech. But, my JOB is to make that story RELATABLE to my audience! DUH! Once I realized that, I felt a huge burden lifted off my shoulders!

As a result, here I am a District Champion on my way to the International Speech Semi-Final round competition. And, I can't WAIT!!!

What is YOUR speech about? YOU? or THEM?

Welcome to my Toastmasters Blog

With my 2010 Toastmasters International Speech Contest run over, I decided to put some thoughts down about what I have learned in this process.

First of all, if you ever find yourself thinking about competing, DO IT!!! I am more confident than I have ever been in my life! After speaking to a crowd of about 100 fellow Toastmasters at the District Conference this month, I now can go back to my club and present a speech with NO FEAR!!

I LOVED being up on that stage! And, I can't wait to do it again. Anyone wishing to receive a text copy of my contest speech, "Time Out!" please comment here with your email address.

Many people have asked what the biggest lesson I learned from this whole process. That's easy! I learned how to take a look inward without fear. In order to write an inspirational speech, you MUST look deep into your heart. Many of us don't like to do that... it's scary in there! But, believe me, you will find more passion, more tranquility, more peace, and more fulfillment if you just take that step: look at your life. Decide what is the one piece of advice you would give your child if you only had 5-7 minutes left to live.

Well, that's the begnning of this journey. I can't wait to see where it ends up!

~ Liza
"Take time out today so you won't be forced
to take time out tomorrow."